Shameless Self-Promotion

Greetings, fellow time-wasters. You stumbled upon the initial post of what surely will become one of your favorite daily, or semi-weekly web visits. Well, probably not, but it at least gives you an excuse to lay off of Google Earth for a few minutes. 

Right now, you're probably overwhelmed by many questions - 

- Bryant, why is there a large photo of Kurt Russell on your blog?

- Furthermore, why is your blog named after Kurt Russell?

- Why do you even have a blog? That's stupid. Plus, you aren't funny and can't write. 

- What is the fastest way to exit this blog?

That's fine. Questions are welcomed here, even dumb ones. 

I'll do my best to make you feel comfortable here, and soon Kurt Russell's face will be a homing beacon of sorts, a glowing front porch light on this, your familiar front doorstep of a blog. 

Simply put, this blog is a tribute to Kurt Russell because he represents all that is still right with man in this, the Era of the Metrosexualization of Man. Women, you know what I'm talking about. Men, believe it or not, there is a 96.275% chance you have fallen victim to the soul-sucking trends of metrosexualization in recent years. Even yours truly nearly fell into the dark depths of this tragic monster. But I was saved. I was saved by men like Kurt Russell. Men like Clint Eastwood, John Wayne, and Nolan Ryan. Men who would look at a typical fake-tanned, hundred-dollar haircut, designer jean-wearing, waxed-eyebrow, techno music-blasting douche bag and say - "What the hell is wrong with you, son?!"

For it is not those superficial fads that this blog represents. It is the simple pleasures of manhood that women and metrosexuals can never take away from us. It's the joy of that fresh-out-of-bed ball scratch. Or that cathartic, ass cheek rippling fart right after you kiss your girlfriend or wife good night. It's drinking beer and watching football when your girl wants you to go bedspread shopping. It's not shaving your chest hair. It's proudly wearing your high school district championship t-shirt at age 29, because you know damn well your team would pound the shit out of those current underachievers. It's Dirty Harry marathons on AMC, MXC on Spike, and pixellated porno on channels you can't afford. 

This is a blog for men. Real men. And women, I guess you can read, too. I can't really stop you. Heck, maybe you'll learn a thing or two. 

Now, as for those other questions - first, I started a blog because I feel the world needs to hear my voice, my unique opinions and wordly knowledge and expertise, and - hell, who am I kidding? I just have an abundance of free time and need a distraction. 

And if you really want to leave, just click that little 'X' up in the corner. And go screw yourself. 

For those who choose to stay, welcome. And enjoy yourselves, and together we will do our part to bring a little respect back to the manly men left out there. 

Just like Kurt Russell would do.