WWKRD Highly Anticipated Movie Watch

Mel Gibson.

He is one of the greatest actors and directors of our time. His list of credits includes some of the most influential and groundbreaking films ever made.

Mad Max
Lethal Weapon
The Patriot
We Were Soldiers
Apocalypto
The Passion of the Christ
Braveheart

Are you not entertained?

Unfortunately, our man Mel has been kicked to the curb by Hollywood after a few highly-publicized diatribes, highlighted by his anti-semitic rant after a DUI arrest in Malibu and the YouTube sensation that was his secretly-recorded pillow talk with Russian babe Oksana CanIBuyAVowelA.

But we here at WWKRD don't give a crap about an artist's personal life. We've all got problems. We'd all love to curse at Jews and Russians. And if our name wasn't Mel Gibson, we'd probably get away with it. Leave the man alone.

As for Mel, he's in desperate need of a box office winner to reclaim his place as a Hollywood A-lister and perhaps diffuse some of his off-the-screen distractions.

He needs a role that will cement his legend. One that will leave audiences breathless, gasping in awe and pure unadulterated wonder at his acting gifts.

There is only one such way to win the crowd. And that, loyal readers, is to wear a beaver on his hand.




Mel Gibson in: "The Beaver"

Coming soon to a theater near you.

WWKRD Man of the Week Award

WWKRD is proud to announce the newest member of the Man of the Week club - Mr. Keenan Cahill.



"Who the hell is that?" you may ask.

In short, Cahill is the latest YouTube sensation, having found the spotlight through a series of awful dance- and lip-synching videos to popular songs, as well as several incrementally worse singing videos to said popular songs.




But WWKRD recognizes the heart and the courage of this little man. It takes a lot of guts to put yourself out there to the world, especially when it comes to presenting your talents, or lack thereof.

What young Cahill may lack in sex appeal, marketability, and height, he more than makes up for with some astonishingly solid white boy rhythm and some facial expressions that are second to none.

The kid's got charm, and WWKRD can appreciate that.

So here's to you, Keenan Cahill, for keeping it real. You're welcome in our house any time.

Jerk of the Week

With the return of WWKRD comes some new features. One such feature is 'Jerk of the Week', recognizing those who have endeavored to excel and achieve in the field of the asinine.

This week's award goes to Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones.

Mr. Jones, a fixture in Dallas since his purchase of the team in the late 1980's, has assembled three world championship teams, invested in several hall of famers such as Troy Aikman and Emmitt Smith, and built what is easily the most impressive athletic stadium in the world - Cowboys Stadium in Arlington, Texas.

He has made a shitload of money through shrewd investments both on and off the field.

He is also undoubtedly, unquestionably, 100% certifiably batshit crazy.

With the Cowboys off to an incomprehensibly awful 1-7 start, Jones finally made the difficult decision to fire head coach Wade Phillips, who in his own right may very well be a Jerk of the Week in the near future.

But the onus here is on Jones, who has managed to side-step all blame for his involvement in team operations and routinely deflect the criticism on his staff and the players.

It should be stated that Jones is notorious for selecting draft prospects and free agents by hand, regardless of the actual needs of his team, and in spite of questioning from his head coach and advisors.

Jones has grown so giddy over the financial prospects and entertainment value of his 'world' that he has stuffed his oily, grubby mitts into the cookie jar so far that they've become stuck.

And as a result, his team has quickly fallen from grace into the cold, dank cellar of the NFC East and the National Football League itself.

Simply stated - the Dallas Cowboys are a joke.

So, Mr. Jerry Jones, we here at WWKRD would like to say to you: You're a Jerk.

Get over yourself. The fans in the Dallas/Fort Worth metroplex are some of the most passionate in the league. They have tasted titles and greatness, long before you and your traveling circus rolled into town. Roger Staubach and Tom Landry and the like certainly didn't need your shenanigans to get the job done.

It's time for you to weigh what must be an impossible decision, Mr. Jones:

Do you want to put a winning team on the field and step down from the limelight - leaving football decisions to football experts?

Or do you want to hog the spotlight and find new and inventive ways to obtain cash with which to wipe your botox-elasticized bum?

Think long and hard, Jerry. The choice must be awfully hard for you, but for those who truly love the team, it's a no-brainer.

WWKRD knows what it would do.

Back From Sabbatical

We here at WWKRD are excited to be back up and blogging after a much-needed year off.

We'd like to reiterate our committment to bringing you the finest and most entertaining thoughts on the decline of masculinity, the absurdities of the douchebag culture, and various other odds and ends from around the globe.

As the blog's name suggests, no man better exemplifies the sensibilities and macho badassedness of WWKRD than Mr. KR himself, Kurt Russell.

So with our heroic leader in mind, let the madness resume.