I'm Nikki Cox. Remember Me? I used to be hot.

Hide the children!

But seriously, we here at WWKRD are completely deflated to learn that once-beautiful, redheaded goddess of the WB, Nikki Cox, has morphed into a minion of the evil race of botox-riddled, collagen-bloated, eating disorder cases that infect Hollywood and are slowly taking over this once-great nation of natural beauties. Consider this dated photo of this once-stunning Cox:

Now, the WWKRD staff questions the authenticity of Ms. Cox's breasts, however glorious they may be, but needless to say, there was nothing wrong with this woman that warranted her visit to the Joker clinic of plastic surgery.

Sadly, Ms. Cox has faded into anonymity, far from the forefront of the minds of millions of hormonally-charged American teenagers, and deep down somewhere in the catacombs of the WB's video vault, tucked in beside "Sister, Sister" and whatever Steve Harvey show was on at the time.

We here at WWKRD proudly stand at attention and salute the S.S. Cox as she sinks into the depths of the American conscious. Farewell, you once glorious vessel.

Joakim Noah: Social Revolutionary

In the midst of what may turn out to be the most entertaining, unpredictable, and suspenseful NBA Playoffs in recent memory, Chicago Bulls forward Joakim Noah took time out of Game 3 of the Eastern Conference Finals to raise an important issue that in no way relates to basketball:

How come straight people can't say the word "gay" in a derogatory manner, but gay people can say whatever they want?

Now, hold your horses there, WWKRD P.C. Police, it's not what you think. WWKRD is an open-minded, accepting blog that encourages happiness and peace no matter your orientation.

However, with this being the second such offense in the NBA this season, with the first being Kobe Bryant's use of the word "faggot" directed at an official, it makes us wonder about the prevalence of double-standards in this nation that preaches open-mindedness but increasingly cracks down on personal expression.

For example, ponder this hypothetical scenario: A group of homosexual males are playing a game of pickup basketball. One of the player's game is so bad, his fundamentals so poor, his defense so porous, that an opposing player calls him a "pussy lover" or a "box muncher."

Now, obviously, that is a shot at the player's homosexuality, of which he is assumed to be quite proud. It's an insult, and one that some people might find offensive.

Yet, because homosexuality is considered an alternative lifestyle, and heterosexuality the norm, this is not considered a derogatory phrase. In essence, minority groups in this nation have an unspoken free pass to say whatever the hell they damn well want, which WWKRD finds quite perplexing.

What if Joakim Noah was gay? Would he still have been fined $50,000? What if the fan whom the jab was directed was gay? Then Noah's taunt turns into a statement of fact.

It is common knowledge that certain minority groups use "offensive" racial slang amongst themselves, yet outside groups are publicly skewered for even whispering such filth.

WWKRD believes that if you don't want to be called something, you probably shouldn't be calling your peers such things. And your use of the word in public inherently grants others the right to use it as well, free of incrimination and public discipline.

In short, this is the First Amendment. Hundreds of thousands of Americans have given their lives over the centuries to protect our right to say whatever we want. Men and women who stared death in the face with a courage and will that you and I cannot even fathom. How do you think they would feel if told that First Amendment rights are regulated because it might hurt someone's feelings?

We here at WWKRD are pretty sure those folks would tell America to toughen the hell up. It's just a word. Even toddlers are above this sort of thing. "Sticks and stones might break my bones, but words can never hurt me."

Perhaps toddlers should be running our sports leagues and governments. But we digress...

This Noah incident also reflects disciplinary inconsistencies that exist within the NBA itself, where players can cover themselves in tattoos that frequently depict highly profane and/or sexually explicit images, yet this form of personal expression is inexplicably not regulated by the league.

In the aftermath of the Noah incident, we here at WWKRD can only shrug our shoulders. Out of the approximately 1,000 curse words uttered by players during the course of a game, a guy gets punished for that one. So, we say to you, NBA, and David Stern - either eliminate cursing altogether, or just let it go.